We are told by many authors and spiritual advisors and self-help gurus that all we need to do when we want something is to focus on it intensely, to visualize it coming about, thereby attract it to us…voila, we have it!
However, even though a few people claim that this practice has proven successful for them, the vast majority of people have given their psychic all to this endeavor, wishing for a mate, riches, a better job, better health etc etc.  But no voila!

So, if it is a law of nature that the universe will bring us what we desire if we desire it enough, if we focus on it intensely enough, how come so many people are disappointed and still wanting, even needing?

Some would say they were not practicing consistently enough, or with enough faith. I would agree that staying with it and believing the desired outcome can be achieved will help people to accomplish many goals in life.

If  all anyone needed to do was believe that fervent wishing makes it so, there would be very few problems left in the world and fewer people still suffering and struggling to achieve personal goals, whatever they might be.

Also, we need to take into consideration that there are many people wishing for totally different outcomes !or competing with conflicting wishes.

The fact is that simply visualizing and hoping fervently, giving oneself positive affirmations and expressing desires, giving them up to the universe is seldom going to be what it takes to achieve what we want.

There is more to it than that.

We are complex beings, often with internally conflicting desires, and with conscious and subconscious minds that often have vastly different ways of thinking about and dealing with things; and often complex psychological and worldly issues that require resolution before we can achieve  success in any endeavor.

It is a given that we must feel that we deserve to have what will fulfill us.

I will stress here though, that this belief must be a one agreed upon on all levels of consciousness to produce any positive effects.

I think most people know that as human beings we have enormous potential and the potential for getting what we want out of life, and that we can develop the talents skills and other abilities needed to attain our goals. We live in a free country where the hopes and dreams of all people are promised fulfillment.  

It is called the American dream.

It is necessary though for us to wake up… stop dreaming and to get realistic and down to earth, and get to work in order to accomplish what we feel is necessary for our happiness.

To believe, as we are taught in the “Secret” and other manuscripts, that the universe will grant what we want because our desires attract them to us is not a scientifically or even anecdotally proven.  It’s a lovely notion and encourages many people. It gives them hope. And some even get some temporary satisfactions from the practice, so I have heard.

I do not disqualify the meaning and power of believing, or the value of  focusing on attracting what  we want.

It is simply not enough.

Like attracts like in  Homeopathy.  However, basic physics proves that  opposites attract; like repels like. As in all things human and in nature there are many paradoxes. There is much we still don’t understand.

What I do understand and know for certain is  that  people  do indeed need to believe in themselves and their abilities to bring into their lives what they want and need: These are often some of the qualifications required for success.

When a person is in therapy with me,  if they express self  doubts about their ability   for achieving their goals,  I get them to realize something very fundamental and important:  That the very fact they have come to me and are sitting in that room with me speaks of their instincts for self-improvement; that their subconscious  beliefs in their potential and their conscious desires to be well or overcome problems has brought them to me.  Also that on deep levels of consciousness they know they deserve their needs and best wishes fulfilled.

 In other words, they already qualify!

Being positive in expectations and in attitudes is essential for maintaining the “spirit”,  the motivation to do whatever else it takes to achieve the desired results.

But it’s not enough.

Just as love is not enough in any relationship to create harmony and compatibility, we need to work within ourselves and in the world and with others to bring  about the life we want for ourselves.

So, yes, desire with great intensityhowever, don’t use all your psychic energy and time on that alone. Have faith;believe that you are destined to have what you desire; And if you like, believe that the universe, God, and life itself promised you all you want and need. Pray for it too if you believe in the power of prayer.

I was brought up to believe that God helps those who help themselves.

Make sure that you know what it is that you must DO within yourself and in the world to succeed, and develop all of the other qualifications required for success.

And be willing to commit to the PROCESS of getting what you want.

Wishing won’t make it so.  Your subconscious mind doesn’t take your wishes as instructions or intentions. It’s more complicated than that. And knowing how to work with your very willing subconscious mind for what you aspire to will make all the difference between success and disappointment.

Surely you know that dreams of accomplishment are only dreams; being a dreamer in the daytime often distracts you from your endeavor.

There is always much to do.

Be willing to do it, whatever it is,  for in the doing there are often challenges to meet and  issues to resolve; yet there is inevitably personal development, and  the unexpected joy that comes from  the process;  self-realization and actualization come only from doing,  and  these experiences are often of greater value and give more satisfaction than the actual achievement we seek. We learn about ourselves and what is really important to us on the way to where we are going.

Sometimes serendipity offers new choices,  a new direction, too. so be open to change course.

Life is an adventure and is often spoken of as a journey.

Everything we do to prepare ourselves and proceed towards our destination is essential to getting there. We get there by taking the steps that assure that we are moving forward.  We may  need to overcome blocks and traverse some difficult territory.

However it is best to focus on the steps you need to take, not only on the goal. Progress will keep your motivation strong.

You may even need some luck to get there.

But that’s another blog subject.

TTFN all the best, always from Elaine Kissel.