I wish you a wonderfully satisfying holiday season and a healthy prosperous and fulfilling 2010 and beyond.

And to make it  an extra successful and gratifying year for you , I’m going to give you  ten tips on how keep your new year’s resolutions.

 

It’s possible that by the time you get around to reading this, your holidays will  be a lot of happy memories; you will have settled down and allowed yourself time to de stress. I hope. So this blog is more about where and how to go from this year to next with the right and best  kind of  attitude and mind-set.

About now, if not before today, you may be seriously thinking of your New Year’s resolutions, perhaps  hoping and even wondering if you are going to be able to keep them this year. So I’m going to give you some useful tips on how to make it happen, because after a few months into a New Year a great number of people come to me frustrated with themselves because they haven’t been successful in achieving their goals. Sometimes they have made unsuccessful attempts to make positive changes for many years, and recognize the  need some specialized  help.

I want to help  YOU to start out as you mean to carry on, to have the right kind of goal orientation , and be successful from now on, so this time next year you will be looking back and smiling about how well you did in 2010.

I believe that every day is an opportunity for a fresh start if  in the days before you have faltered or slipped on the path;  today is giving you a  chance to  pick yourself up, brush yourself off and start all over again. There truly is no time better than the present. However,  if you are like many people you are buying into the age-old theory that a new year is the best time  for a fresh start  it can indeed bring with it refreshed incentives and motivation. It’s so often that at the end of a year people  feel more ready to make positive changes or achieve new heights of success, or begin a new endeavor. Many are eager to be out with the old and in with the new. Ringing out the old and welcoming in the new has powerful symbolic influences; for many it feels like a good time for clearing away old habits and moving on to better things and taking life up on its offers of new opportunities for success. So, okay, go for it!

Most people want to get the holiday’s extra obligations over with first, so they don’t engage in making changes until Jan 1st. or there about. They permit themselves to indulge freely with the idea that their extravagance in all things during the holidays is acceptable and only temporary. The problem for too many people is that  they don’t realize that the planning and psychological preparation for making positive changes requires serious thought and realistic approaches in order  to succeed. So if you haven’t done all the necessary planning and prepping, psychologically and logistically to be sure you will succeed in 2010, let me give you some help so you are able to proceed in comfort and without having to deal with disappointment in yourself.

Answer the following questions honestly.

1. Do you honestly want to do what you are resolving to do?For if you are not proceeding with the complete and honest conviction that this is truly what you want to do, rather than what you feel you ought to do; or doing it to try and please someone else, don’t promise yourself to do it. I”m not saying that doing it with all due consideration for those who care for you  and want to see you make positive changes is the wrong motive;  Just be sure that it is what YOU want, then its a win win.

2. Be sure you have all the necessary information, wherewithal and resources at your disposal to enable you follow through. Having the right plan and knowing how and what you need to do to achieve your goals is essential for being able to stick with it through all the ups and downs you face in life until you reach the goal.

3. Be realistic. Is it possible, all things considered, to achieve your goals within the time you have set to do so?  Have you factored in all the variables and determined to be flexible?Most often people are unable to succeed because their expectations for themselves are impossible to live up to, which results in either giving up with a sense of futility, and/or frustration, and ultimate failure. Sit down and think this through carefully. Don’t set yourself up for disappointment. Know yourself and your ability to cope with the inevitable challenges along the way.

4. Do you have the kind of support you need to succeed?Think about this, too: Do you need people to acknowledge your progress? Do you need others to contribute in some way towards your success? Have you asked them for that support? Do you recognize the need for professional help to overcome issues that have prevented you for succeeding in the past? There is no shame or blame in enlisting the right kind of help. We all need help at times, it is wise to take it and make the best of it if you truly want to achieve your goals.

5. For some people it isn’t wise to share New Years resolutions with others. It engenders sense of pressure, and fear of failure that can undermine your confidence.   And if for legitimate reasons you are not successful, it results in embarrassment. For others sharing the good  intentions adds more motivation. Consider where you are in this before letting others know your New Year’s resolutions.

6. Make a genuine commitment. A quote from my book The Mind Is Willing and my Mind Mastery course,  ” Decide with a strong and unequivocal resolve that you will do all in your power to succeed. Decisions energize and activate your free will and release all of your personal power to go to work for you.”  Also when your subconscious knows what direction you have chosen and you give it the necessary conscious support, it will employ all available resources to aid you. Refresh and reinforce your decision daily.

7. Make sure to acknowledge your progress and the steps forward you have taken rather than focusing on what you have not yet achieved. Realize some days it will be easier than others. Treat yourself as you would a dearly beloved child. Nurture yourself towards success.

8. Are you confident you can do what it takes? Do you know what it takes? Confidence enables you to move forward  armed with what you have learned from previous experience;  know what works for you and what doesn’t. Do your best not to repeat mistakes. All too many people forget what caused them to fall off the path towards their goals. There is always a reason.

9. The old myth that in 28 days you will have permeated a new behavior  is still  touted by those who ought to know better. Behavior modification gurus forget that all behavior is motivated. Know what motivates the behavior you want to change, find a way to release yourself from that driving force (the subconscious motivation) behind the old habit, and then be patient in the process of creating new good habits. Everyone is different in many ways so you need to understand that with your learning style, your way of processing and integrating may cause you to take longer to permeate positive changes. Be patient.

10. If you hesitate on the path, if you stumble along the way, if you take a detour, don’t  lose  focus on the forward steps you need to take from there on;  just forgive yourself, learn from the experience and get going again. The only failure is the failure to make a genuine attempt.

Finally, always keep in mind that every new day is an opportunity and reward in itself. When you have a sense of purpose and a sense of direction there is meaning in all you do. Hold onto that meaning in your mind and heart. I wish you all the best, always, for every day of your life.

Sincerely Elaine Kissel